Recently I've been thinking a lot about love and relationships more than I ever did. I guess it's pretty much because I'm growing up and building my personality that would probably stick with me for quite some time. All my life I was for some reason the secret vault to all my friends and close family, this is played a huge part in building and shaping the person I am now for better or worse. For me, I always knew love, broken heats, happiness, and disappointment long before i experience any of them first hand. That's why I know things..know facts...have experience...and might have some tricks here and there ;)
This is proven to be very useful, not to me quite yet, but at least when my best friend and one of my favorite people in the world came to me for advise I actually did say something useful..one hell of an investment I was!!!
Even though she thinks she learned something from me, it's me who learned a very important lesson from that situation. I was just wondering "why we bother with love if it never lasts?" and she made me realize that it does last...it does!
The problem is that people mis-define love, I did once, not every couple are in love. Love is so hard to find, only happens once, and not necessarily to all of us..that's what love is. Lucky people find love, normal people find something really really close, and sad and grumpy people just don't know it. And it's not very obvious the difference between real love and just a loving relationship, only time and very special occasions reveal that thin line that separates them, that separates lucky people from normal people.
My big lesson here is: How do we find love? We don't, love finds us!!!
Did she know over 10 years ago when she met him and fell in love that time will pass and he'll still love her and choose her over and over..No, she didn't. So, she didn't find love, love found her, and that's how we know it's real love.
It's not a matter of finding love that we worry about, it's a matter of how to be patient..how to take that leap into the unknown. That part i haven't figured out yet, cause out of all my flaws impatience is my worst. I wonder all the time if I'll ever find love, if i will then when, where, how...endless questions that only trouble me.
Yeah i can give advice to dozens and dozens of people but i can't help myself. I can tell the magic steps to get a boyfriend, or to make up with your husband, but I can't follow my own steps. It's always easier to say than do I guess.
But as long as I know love exists, I'm putting myself out there for him to find me ;)
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